Best viewed in 1280x1024
The Daily Raider is brought to you by the Project for an Unamerican Century and the Ronnie Gardocki Beard Preservation Society. The Daily Raider accepts donations, but we will only use them for liquor, cocaine and South American prostitutes.
|
Chuck Palahniuk - Fight Club Review |
||
|
Chuck Palahniuk - Fight Club Review by: Doom 1996-09-03 Narrator meets a guy named Tyler Durden through a thoroughly homosexual encounter and they quickly set upon a joint venture: fight club! Shirtless dudes fighting in basements releases the aggression that they've been conditioned to repress by political correctness, domestic living and capitalist, consumerist culture. It's white-collar anarchy for the 90s, dudes! |
|
|
Surprisingly Unironic Books 2: Team Bush |
||
|
Surprisingly Unironic Books 2: Team Bush by: Doom 2008-07-06 Why would a business want to base its leadership off a president who bases his leadership on shitty business? Isn't that kinda unnecessary? Why not remove one layer and base your business on shitty business? See, it makes no goddamn sense. And that is where the hilllllarity starts. Open the book to any fucking page and you will find something more hilarious than Kathy Griffin's flailing to keep relevant (which, actually, is more sad than funny, but whatever). |
|
|
Jack Thompson - Out of Harm's Way Review |
||
|
Jack Thompson - Out of Harm's Way Review by: Doom 2008-05-14 Book starts off fairly dry, but reaches a mountain of hilarity within the first 50 pages, when he finds out about a teen crisis hotline featuring prerecorded messages which, according to him, promote eeeevil. Such messages include "sexual orientation is not a choice", "kids are known to experiment with drugs. Try to stay away from the more dangerous, addictive ones, and whatever you do, don't drive a car while impaired" and "don't let anyone tell you what to believe". Note these quotes come from paraphrasings done by Jack Thompson, which is why I do not cite the tape saying religion is a myth, because Jack claims it "in effect" says it, which to a conservative can fucking mean anything. |
|
|
Stop teaching our kids to kill Review |
||
|
Stop teaching our kids to kill Review by: Doom and Cho Seung-Hui 2008-04-16 Basically, they think the amount of violence on television, in movies, in video games, what have you, has contributed to a violent society which breeds this killers unintentionally. If you expect this to be done with nuance and careful attention taken (so as not to simply generalize)...you're really fucking optimistic as to what something goddamn called Stop teaching our kids to kill contains, aren't you? Jesus Christ, the entire argument amounts to "THESE THINGS HAVE VIOLENCE IN THEM, AND KIDS ARE EXPOSED TO THEM, SO THEY'RE EVIL" and nothing more. |
|
|
Great White Literature 1: Animorphs |
||
|
Great White Literature 1: Animorphs by: Lorne Michaels 2008-02-06 Frau Applegate characterizes the Yeerks the way they are supposed to be characterized - as money hungry Jews who want complete world domination. They crawl into the heads of unsuspecting humans and subvert their free will. Without human hosts to leech off of, they are blind, deaf and unable to speak. Little worms at best. Sounds like Judaism to me! |
|
|
Doom Ruins Things For You 1: Harry Potter |
||
|
Doom Ruins Things For You 1: Harry Potter by: Doom 2007-10-28 Albus Dumbledore: The first man in history whose beard is white as a result of excess semen stains. |
|
|
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Review |
||
|
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Review by: Doom 2007-08-18 The characters remain cardboard cutout pussies as usual. Harry, Ron, Hermione - all basically the same whiny, nerdy character. Name me one thing Ron added to the series other than perhaps a point of identification for poor kids who had to go to MATC instead of UWM. You won't be able to. He acted as, throughout the entire series, the best friend who's not as talented, smart or attractive as Harry. Hermione is pretty much the same, except replace 'not as talented, smart or attractive' with 'won't put out'. |
|
|
Wanderground Review |
||
|
by: Nixon 2007-07-11 Wanderground does have a great ending, though. A huge mass of women and animals gather together in what can be best described as a massive bear pile to channel all their energies into healing Mother Earth. It might be too late. Man has done so much rape/damage (they are referred to in the final chapter simply as slayers) that Earth might soon, I don't know, put on an Evanescence album and slit her wrists in a bathtub, but if not, they're going to save it. |
|
|
Bill Kristol - The War Over Iraq Review |
||
|
Bill Kristol - The War Over Iraq Review by: Doom 2007-07-11 Kristol and Kaplan (the fascist who co-wrote it) neatly divide up The War Over Iraq into three sections: one, the 'Saddam evil' section, two, a brief history of foreign policies of Bush I, Clinton and Bush II, and three, the mission/blitzkrieg America needs to unleash upon those fuckin' Iraqi desert coons. The Saddam one outlines all his crimes against his people and others (like the mythical Weapons of Mass Destruction claim), while often glossing over our prior relationship with him in the 70s and 80s. |
|
|
Dick Morris - Condi vs. Hillary Review |
||
|
Dick Morris - Condi vs. Hillary Review by: Doom 2007-07-04 Books like these, at their base level, work as reverse psychology for the pundit in question who writes them. Let me explain. Dick Morris' future career literally depends on Hillary Clinton either running as the Democratic candidate for President or winning the White House. What the fuck else does he have going for him other than kinda knowing the Clintons at some point in his life? Talent? Charisma? Fuck no. |
|
|
David Horowitz - Uncivil Wars Review |
||
|
David Horowitz - Uncivil Wars Review by: Doom 2007-06-27 Horowitz's book doesn't so much as address criticism or provide a fleshed-out defense or backing for his argument as he does document every single time he went to a university and someone didn't like what he had to say. Or when a newspaper columnist or a politician or an activist disagreed. Hell, this review will probably be in Uncivil Wars 2: You're Hurting My Feelings, Guys by the end of the year. |
|
|
David Horowitz - The Shadow Party Review |
||
|
David Horowitz - The Shadow Party Review by: Doom 2007-06-06 Don't look at her pro-war position or stances on free trade; just look at her. She's a woman (strike 1). Married to Comrade Bill Clinton, a commie when compared to, say, Ronald Reagan or George W. Bush (strike 2). And she wants to change our current health care system (STRIKE 1 BILLION). SHE MUST OBVIOUSLY HAVE A BUST OF JOSEPH STALIN IN HER BEDROOM. |
|
|
Smallville: Speed Review |
||
|
by: Doom 2007-05-19 Nor do racist people use the term "Afreaka". They say "nigger" and "spic" and all those good, fun racial slurs. None of this "Afreaka" shit. The only time racists are that tame is when it's for children's TV and they can't get away with the good slurs. I swear, if I hear "you people" one more time... |
|
|
Bill O'Reilly - Culture Warrior Review |
||
|
Bill O'Reilly - Culture Warrior Review by: Doom 2007-02-28 I read somewhere that for every copy of Culture Warrior bought, O'Reilly plans to send one to the men and women in our armed forces who are currently losing in Afghanistan and Iraq. Uh...don't. |
|
|
Infinite Crisis Book Review |
||
|
by: Doom and Superboy-Prime 2007-01-22 Infinite Crisis: The Book. Infinite Crisis...The Book. Infinite...Crisis...The...Book. Well, my mind is officially blown out of the (Duke) Stratosphere. Why would you bother to adapt a shitty comic book series into a book, since the kids who don't like reading are already going to be the ones inclined to pick the comic book and not the book? The answer, as it is with every single DC question, is money. |
|
|
John Gibson - The War on Christmas Review |
||
|
John Gibson - The War on Christmas Review by: Doom 2006-12-31 John "Fuckhead" Gibson: "The wagers of this war on Christmas are a cabal of secularists, so-called humanists, trial lawyers, cultural relativists, and liberal, guilt-wracked Christians - not just Jewish people." |
|
|
David Horowitz - The Professors Review |
||
|
David Horowitz - The Professors Review by: Doom 2006-12-29 The original title was "NIGGERS AMONG US!" |
|
|
Rush Limbaugh - See, I Told You So Review |
||
|
Rush Limbaugh - See, I Told You So Review by: Doom 2006-12-02 "You didn't believe me when I said I could eat an entire refrigerator! Shows what YOU know!!" |
|
|
Surprisingly Unironic Books 1: The Rumsfeld Way |
||
|
Surprisingly Unironic Books 1: The Rumsfeld Way by: Doom 2006-10-15 "There's three ways to do things. The right way, the wrong way and the Rumsfeld way." "Isn't that the wrong way?" "Yeah, but quagmireier!"
|
|
|
John Gibson - Hating America Review |
||
|
John Gibson - Hating America: The New World Sport Review by: Doom 2006-10-13 "The Axis of Envy": Canada, Belgium and South Korea. Canada wouldn't survive without us, Belgium is a small little country, and "We should let North Korea invade them if they won't let us do whatever we want with whatever in the world". Gibson continues on verbally blasting these countries until he realizes South Korea declared War on Arbor Day a few weeks ago. "I MUST GO NOW! THERE IS A POINTLESS BOOK WAITING IN THE WINGS TO BE WRITTEN!" |
|
|
Raider Grudgematch: Battle of the Pundits |
||
|
Let Freedom Ring by Sean Hannity vs. Red, White and Liberal by Alan Colmes by: Doom and John Madden 2006-09-23 Alan Colmes sucks at being a pundit and the book he wrote proves it. For instance, he devotes an entire chapter to what the Right does right. Do you see Hannity writing about how some of ADOLF HOWARD DEANLER's ideas are good? No, you don't. |
|
|
Rush Limbaugh - The Way Things Ought To Be Review |
||
|
Rush Limbaugh - The Way Things Ought To Be Review by: Doom 2006-09-15 SLOW DOWN TUBBY, YOU'RE NOT ON THE MOON YET! |
|
|
Bill O'Reilly - Those Who Trespass |
||
|
Bill O'Reilly - Those Who Trespass Review by: Doom 2006-07-05 The tome reveals what the Bilster thinks about himself; that nightly television is a drug to him and if that drug gets taken away from him, he will resort to murder. Mr. Murdoch, I think the book's his way of saying "Don't ever fire me, or else I'll kill you." |
|
|
100 People Who Are Screwing Up America |
||
|
100 People Who Are Screwing Up America Review by: Doom 2006-06-30 Al Gore, despite not holding political office right now, finds himself #18 on the list for reasons I can't understand. First Goldberg calls him a panderer because of an amazing TWO circumstantial examples, one of which easily loses credibility if you're not pro-life, and then Goldberg compares him to Osama bin Laden. Sure, why not, Al Gore's global warming crusades obviously are a transparent attempt to hijack SUVs and drive them into children's hospitals. THAT FUCKER. |
|
|
Billy Corgan - Blinking With Fists |
||
|
Billy Corgan - Blinking With Fists Review by: Doom 2006-06-17 The central theme for the poetry in Blinking with Fists is egotism, specifically the egotism of the author [and assumed narrator of all of the poems]. Most, if not all stanzas of every poem in the book have at least one line that begins with "I" or involves the words "my" or "me". Poetry can be about many subjects, and if Corgan wants to be introspective in his, fine, but the mindless self-indulgence [Jimmy Urine rocks] has to stop at some point. There has to be some content to what Corgan says in these poems for it to be worthwhile as anything other than stupid rock star whiny masturbation. |
|
|
Bill O'Reilly - Who's Looking Out For You? |
||
|
Bill O'Reilly - Who's Looking Out For You? Review by: Doom 2006-06-14 "Clinton sucks. The elitist media that I'm not a part of nor have ever been a part of is evil. The only time the government is wrong is when a Democrat is in power. I wish I was as attractive as George Clooney, and I really wish those pills would work like the box said they would. People who don't believe in God are wrong and enforcing the Constitution when I don't agree with it is treasonous. God, I need to find some poor innocent girl to harass, while masturbating to the thought of kidnapped white girls. Oh, and Clinton still sucks. You can't rely on anyone but me, so buy my Factor Gear." |
|
|
Viva La Steve Forbes' Flat Tax Revolution! |
||
|
Viva La Steve Forbes' Flat Tax Revolution Review by: Doom 2006-06-10 Steve Forbes makes the audacious claim that if there was a flat tax in the 30's, Hitler would've never come to power. So all it'd take is a time machine to go back in time to the late 1920's in order to run Steve Forbes as a candidate for President, and then World War II would've never happened, nor would the Berlin wall, most of the Cold War, shit, maybe if we go back in time and get Steve appointed as Taxation Tsar in Monarchist Russia, the Revolution would've never happened and to this day we'd still have a country of drooling retards to the east of Europe! Good God, we could turn the world into a utopia with Steve Forbes' Taxariffic Time Travelin'! "Quick Marty, we have to stop the New Deal or your parents will have never been born!" |
|
|
GIT-R-DONE |
||
|
Larry the Cable Guy - Git-R-Done!!1111 Review by: Doom 2006-05-04 I will show how to write a Larry Southern joke. Here's how: fart + drinking x fart / unsightly relative = Southern joke. Once you know how to do it, the reason for reading the book becomes less and less enticing.
|
|
|
How To Talk To A Liberal If You Must Review |
||
|
Ann Coulter - How To Talk To A Liberal If You Must Review by: Nixon 2006-03-05 Now bitching about Clinton is a hallmark of conservative pundits. It's like breathing or taking a shit, they have to insult the Clintons or they die, shriveling up like raisins in the sun. Coulter's book is no exception. Despite this book coming out four years after the Clintons left office, she dedicated an entire chapter to him, HAVING ALREADY WRITING ANOTHER BOOK ONLY ON HIM. So, this is clearly an obsession that transcends logic.
|
|
|
Michael Savage - The Savage Nation Review |
||
|
Michael Savage - The Savage Nation Review by: Doom 2006-02-14 "Anger, neglect and hate raised me", he contends. He says that this should be how all children are raised, and that 'tolerant' and 'open-minded' parents are turning kids into sissies who wear dresses. Well, let's see, Savage suggests being raised by anger, neglect and hate, because that will churn out a functional member of society like him, presumably. Michael Savage was raised by that and look how he turned out! |
|