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Myspace Loser of the Week: PAT LEE
by Doom
http://www.myspace.com/2608886
Pat Lee has a somewhat infamous position in the world of comic books. He is one of the only people I know of who is rewarded for running his own company in the ground and failing to pay creators while driving around in a fancy car. And now he has a Myspace page. Boy, all he needs to do is get a pitchfork and some hooves and he'll be all set, as I'm sure he already has a cell phone he stole from some employee of his while not paying them. For those who don't know who Pat Lee is, he's this Canadian hack of an artist who tries to be manga-like and fails miserably as I'll show later. He also draws a lot of robots, and when he draws humans they usually look like robots too. He founded a company called Dreamwave, who mostly did Transformers comics, until it went under and countless employees went unpaid still to this day. How is Pat Lee rewarded? A Porsche and a new company, Dreamengine. To quote Lewis Black: "The good die young and pricks live forever."
HOLY FUCK WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT EYESORE Oh, it's the design to Pat Lee's Myspace page, showing that all idiots do indeed think alike: all of them have stupid designs. This one is based off the DreamEngine teaser image, an image that will probably be mocked as much as the Dreamwave teaser image is mocked now. Considering that Pat Lee's old Angelfire page was basically him showing off how desirable he is to women, I was hoping we'd get the same thing here but unfortunately for me and fortunately for everyone else he has a girlfriend and thus talks about what movies he likes and what dog he has. His "A learning lesson", however, is chock full of irony and is complete comedic gold and is keeping with the Pat Lee hilarity factor. I will now list them along with what they REALLY mean:
1. Never give up on your dreams even when you've been kicked
down to the lowest level possible. WHAT IT REALLY MEANS: If at first you
don't succeed at not running your company into the ground and failing to pay all
of your loyal employees, instead keeping your nice car, try, try again.
2. Always put a little money aside in case of a rainy day. WHAT IT REALLY
MEANS: By rainy day he means 'when your company's bankrupt, your employees
are unpaid, and you want to keep your fancy car'.
3. True friends are people who will be there for you when you are at your
lowest. WHAT IT REALLY MEANS: If you're not willing to go unpaid for long
periods of time, jeopardizing your house, your family, your entire life, then
you're not a true friend.
4. Whenever you fall down, use your anger in a positive light and take revenge
by being successful at what you want. WHAT IT REALLY MEANS: Be angry at
those whiners who complained 'you aren't paying us' and 'my lack of paycheck has
forced me to perform my wife's childbirth myself, leading to an extremely sick
newborn with numerous deformities', and form a new company that will crash and
burn 3 years later in much the same fashion again.
5. Take pride in trying. If you don't get what you want, just laugh it off and
try again. WHAT IT REALLY MEANS: Laugh off the destruction of others'
livelihood! Openly deride owing in excesses of $1 million dollars! Dodge the
problem, hide in your new nice apartment you bought with company money while
brainstorming another colossal failure of a company!
If you remove the fact that Pat Lee's a lying piece of shit with no talent whatsoever, he's still a loser as shown by his Myspace page. His pictures are typical, pictures of him, one of him in a 'wacky' pose, one of his girlfriend, another with him and a prostitute, a picture of his dog...if I didn't know he was one of the biggest artistic failures in the comics industry I wouldn't give him a second look due to how completely typical he is. There is proof that Pat's an egotist, of course, in this page. He belongs to the group "Hotties - 30 and Over". If there's one word that describes Pat Lee the best, it is most definitely not 'hottie'. Info box also informs us that Pat's only had High School education. That could explain his [lack of] business sense. He also doesn't drink, but he smokes. What a fucking dumbass.
All of his friends look to be as though they are already porn stars or they are intent on becoming porn stars. Well, the female ones. The male ones look like directionless losers who are apt to be in Pat Lee's "Fucking Over Creative Minds Part 2: Electric Boogaloo". Really, who would still be Pat Lee's friend after all the shit he's pulled? He bankrupted a company in astonishing ways, his art flat-out sucks, and has the personality of a wanna-be Loverboy one would find on a Handsome Boy Modeling School or Lovage disc. They're certainly not friends with him because of his looks or his art, so what is it? Hypnosis and mind control, that's what I bet.
Friends don't let friends listen to Pat Lee.
View previous Myspace Losers of the Week:
Week 1: Autistic Josh
Week 2: Lor the Whore
Week 3: Juggalo Brandon
Week 4: Usagi Kou
Week 5: Stupid Wuss Man
Week 6: Jordan Powell