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Myspace Loser of the Week: The Other Side Gets Some
by Doom
It'd be fair to say that we're biased when it comes to politics and political discussion because the Daily Raider's political affiliations range from liberal Democrat to radical socialist, so the conservative end of the spectrum takes a fairly savage beating nearly every week. In interest of fairness and the concession that there are fuckheads on both ends of the political debate, we've decided to bash this week not only an idiot liberal, but an idiot liberal musician. Move over Right Brothers, you've got yourself a liberal counterpoint in Flora Bush!
http://www.myspace.com/florabush
Her origin story [I can't believe some on Myspace is pretentious enough to have an 'origin story' either] is that she is the daughter of our President that THE MAN doesn't want you to know about, because she's liberal and radical and possibly a hater of freedom. You remember those people you used to meet who only rebelled because people liked something? For example, everyone likes vanilla, that person responds with, "Fuck you, I'm eating chocolate" even though they don't even like chocolate all that much. Rebellion for the sake of rebellion! That's the best way the left-wing cause can be noticed, is if it embodies the 'I HATE YOU DAD!!!!' mentality of stupid, pointless, teenage rebellion.
When 'listening' to Flora Bush's 'music', one gets the sensation that somewhere glass is going to break because of her screechy singing. Her sound and range is that of a typical pop star, and there's a Goddamn reason why I don't listen to pop music ever. "Y Do U Lie 2 Me Dad E" does not only just contain terrible spelling, it also contains terrible singing. Here are some sample lyrics should you not want to listen to these 'songs' yourself because of the hearing loss risk involved:
"I don't desire a democratic Mideast,
or a voucher to redeem my reckless youth.
I don't require a social to secure me,
I only want my Dad to tell the truth.
Y, Y, Y, Y do U lie 2 me, Dad-E?
U, U, U, U make me cry.
O, O, O, O U say hello, Daddy,
Hi, hi, hi, when U mean goodbye... goodbye... goodbye...
U lied to justify quagmiring in Iraq,
U lied about John Kerry's Vietnam flashbacks,
U lied about arm-wrestling Jacques Chirac.
When I was three, U told me I was black."
Man. Protest rock has never been this grating!
Oh Christ, and her influences. Man. Her influences. Sum 41, The Ramones [well, now they're all spinning in their graves, even the Ramones who aren't dead yet], Avril Lavinge...Michael Moore...Noam Chomsky?...The French?!?!?!!?!?! WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?! I am literally now boiling with rage. And anger. Her influences do explain why her music is so shitty. Avril Lavinge and Sum 41 are the zeitgeists [or were, 3 years ago] of the soulless rebellion from things the musicians don't understand or actually know about. Sum 41 sucks so bad that the entirety of the universe depends on them sucking to stay in balance, like how the world devourer Galactus is needed. If Sum 41 is Galactus, Flora Bush is Air-Walker, at the very least.
I don't know why she's doing this because it makes no sense. Clearly she's a poor musician and she'd have to be deaf to disagree with this judgment. Oh course, this is supposed to be masterful satire by some master multimedia satirist, and if you are smarter than Dwight Gooden you know that I'm being sarcastic. This 'comedy' doesn't work on both levels. First, it's not good music so it doesn't work on the level of it being played straight, and second, it's not good satire or comedy because the lyrics are not especially funny and the idea isn't exactly original or outrageous, of a stupid screechy singing girl doing bad protest music songs; shit, if you've been in Madison they are everywhere. And better!
This is exactly why conservatives think so little of the liberal grassroots movement other than fears of a Liberal Jewish Hollywood Media. Liberals like this girl act like idiotic clowns and expect that to raise the level of public discourse, when in act it allows conservatives to say "Look! Look, these people are crazy! They have Myspace pages and write songs called 'Puppies and Landmines'!" I suppose it helps though that this effort is done in the name of comedy [however bad] as opposed to The Right Brothers' seriousness. But in the end that's what makes The Right Brothers better and funnier. They think they're doing something important and are really speaking to the masses when in reality they're a bunch of fucktards. The unintentional humor is what makes it funny. This just comes off as Cyndi Lauper singing bad political songs.
View previous Myspace Losers of the Week:
Week 1: Autistic Josh
Week 2: Lor the Whore
Week 3: Juggalo Brandon
Week 4: Usagi Kou
Week 5: Stupid Wuss Man
Week 6: Jordan Powell
Week 7: Pat Lee